A Note From Deanne
This week I've had the opportunity to meet several new people both personally and professionally. Every time I meet someone new it's an opportunity to be my authentic self and live from my core values.
Meeting new people used to be a big anxiety trigger for me because I feared I would be rejected and that I was unworthy in other people's eyes. I used to hide under staircases and duck behind doors so that people wouldn't see me, or simply not leave my home due to the overwhelming symptoms. Now it's a joy to meet someone new because it's an opportunity to let my unique light shine.
This week's issue talks about how to turn the idea that others are judging us on its ear and celebrate who we are.
Dedicated to your success,
Anxiety Tip
Mirror, Mirror on the Wall: Meeting New People and Seeing People as We Are
Have you ever felt anxious at the prospect of meeting someone new? The fear of judgment and criticism -- as well as the physical symptoms like difficulty breathing, rapid heartbeat, and numbness, to name a few -- can be enough to make us go running the opposite direction.
Here's why.
In the midst of fight or flight reactions, we don’t see people as they are. Instead, we are looking at a mirror of ourselves. We see people as WE are. What I mean is this: Because we feel tense and scared, other people seem scary and tense to us. Well, the same thing is true about other people.
We tend to seeing other people from our own viewpoint and our own frame of reference. That's why when we are feeling anxious and our bodies and minds are on hyperdrive we tend to see people as critical, judgmental, and a danger. We are seeing others as WE are -- from our fight or flight perspective -- not as they truly are viewing us.
Sure, in some instances you might encounter a person that is critical or judgmental. Believe it or not, your anxious thoughts are still unhelpful because people who are judgmental and critical don’t see you as you are. They are looking at their OWN mirror. They see you as THEY are. They may not know that, but you do, and that’s a secret that can carry you through.
Being willing to go into a situation and meet new people makes you a success and reflects that you feel you are a worthwhile person. Whenever you take the healthy risk of talking to a new person, no matter what kind of person he or she turns out to be, you have succeeded.
About Deanne
Deanne Repich - Founder and director of the National Institute of Anxiety and Stress, Inc., is an internationally known anxiety educator, teacher, author, and former sufferer who has helped TENS OF THOUSANDS of anxiety sufferers in more than 40 countries to reclaim their lives from anxiety, stress, anxiety disorders, panic attacks, anxiety attacks and social anxiety.
She is the creator of the Conquer Anxiety Success Program, author of more than seventy articles, and publisher of the Anxiety-Free Living printed Newsletter for anxiety sufferers. She is a Member of the National Mental Health Association and the Anxiety Disorders Association of America.
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